No time to be alone

Thinking about not on online for a week, or even a day. Will it be weird? Sort of empty? Have you ever felt uncomfortable when you cannot use Internet on the plane or tube? Now it is weird to disconnect to the world, I mean online world.

How would you feel without Internet?

The author Turkle highlighted the danger of these feelings especially for children. Given an example of children in Alone Together. The study conducted by Tuner(1969) also found that the self now attached to devices and has a gap between real self and its on screen. Another study of Turkle(2008) reported that “we are tethered to our always-on/always-on-us communications devices”.

In Alone Together, Turkle uses Children as an example.They get their cell phones mostly in teens to answer parent’s call whenever parents want to reach out. It ends up leading children tethered to phone while they are supposed to do something alone and feeling frightened. Not only their parents but also their friends expect them to stay available. There are certain kinds of messages that high school students try to ‘fit’ in a peer group. ‘Social pressure’ even exists when people do not get a message back from someone, they sent one.

Not only children but also people at workplace are even always on to respond email and also always on call. Now we are living in life that we have to make a reasonable reason for being unavailable on phone or online. Otherwise, people would not understand it totally or just does not make sense being unavailable. In my case, last year I started to decrease the amount of time I check my phone slowly and texting with my friends became less frequent it used to be. What happened? I felt that I am alone totally and truly when I am alone. This time is truly for me not a time for replying others’ priorities. Also, to decrease the dependency of phone, I tried to not to bring my phone to lecture and library. I felt that I need someone to talk on the way to university as I cannot connect with anyone online. It was weird that I had that feeling which I did not really feel before. More I use the phone less I have less time to be alone.

I agree with Turkle’s point of view that we do not learn or know how to be alone with distraction and stimulation of technology. In my young age, for me I did find myself struggling to be alone for a long time, but now I find it really hard because I already get used to connecting with my friends online all the time.

Only one advantage I could say from always on online is I could connect with my friend in different time zone. Whether it is night or morning, I could find anyone or anytime I could reach out when I need someone to talk. That could turn into downside because it increases the dependency of it. What I learn from being offline is we have to be alone and offline at least certain amount of time everyday. More we have more time we have to think without responding others’ demands which are actually not our priority in our life.

References

Turkle, S. (2008). Always-on/always-on-you: The tethered self. Handbook of mobile communication studies, 121.

Turkle, S. (2017). Alone together: Why we expect more from technology and less from each other. Hachette UK.

Turner, V. (1969). The ritual process: Structure and anti-structure. Piscataway.

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